My husband thinks I'm crazy

As wonderful as Soren is I guess he isn't able to support me in my baby craziness right now. As I mentioned in my previous post I am upset about the fact that I will not be getting health insurance with my job. Well, I mentioned something about this and he walked out of the room.



A few days before he told me he wants to be supportive, but he is so stressed out himself right now that he doesn't know how to help me. He feels really guilty about the fact that I can't get pregnant. (Even though we have no idea what the cause is at this point. It could be all me.) He told me that he thought I needed to go to counseling so I could talk to someone about all my feelings and frustrations and maybe have some help working through them.



I guess this would be helpful, but the pessimistic part of me that has developed from being infertile just figures I'll get some fertile woman for a counselor who has no clue and she will just say stupid and hurtful things to me. Oh how I wish I could have a postive attitude about this. My friend's nickname for me used to be "Sunshine" because I was always so happy and optimistic. I want to be happy again so I will give counseling a try. I just hope it works out for the best.

I HATE My Job

I know I should be grateful to even have a job with how sucky the economy is, but I still despise the company I'm working for. I feel so used and deceived. As you may recall I worked for TJ Maxx for two years. It was okay, but there were so many things that ticked me off while I worked there. This last summer I reached me breaking point of how much junk I could take from them and decided to find a new job for the last 4 months we were in Grand Forks. Well, then we graduated and moved back to California.

While I am so happy to be back in my lovely home state, the economy is in the crapper right now. We have both had the hardest time finding jobs with our newly acquired bachelor's degrees. Most jobs we find in the classifieds are for very specific things, requiring very specific degrees, and wanting at least 5 years experience. Needless to say, we don't really fit the mould for these positions.

One thing I do have a lot of experience in is retail. I worked my way through college doing retail and so I figured that I could at least fall back on that experience until there were some jobs that my degree qualifies me for opening up. A few weeks ago I was offered a position as a Coordinator (same thing as a Department Manager at other retail places) at Marshalls. They are owned by the same company as TJ Maxx so I am even starting the job with some idea of what they want from me. This position pays next to nothing. When I tried to negotiate my hourly wage they made excuses about the economy and payroll, blah, blah, blah.

Anyway, I accepted the position because I was getting desperate for some income and I figure something was better than nothing. Plus Coordinator was supposed to be full-time so I figured I would get health ins and could maybe figure out the infertility stuff.

Well, yesterday one of the managers was introducing me to someone else in the store and said: "This is Julie. She is going to be a part-time coordinator in the store." I responded: "I better not be part-time. This is supposed to be a full-time position." She then said: "Maybe I wrong. We'll have to check with one of the other managers." Then her voice trailed off.

I got off work before the manager I needed to speak with came in so I called back later in the day and she confirmed that I am in fact part-time. She also said most of their coordinators are part-time. Excuse my language, but WHAT THE HELL! All the coordinators at the TJ Maxx I worked at were full-time. I can not even express how pissed off this makes me. I guess this is just one more way for this devil company to screw over their employees. No full-time status means no health insurance and half the monthly pay I was planning on.

I Hate this company. I hope they fail miserably. I don't think I will ever buy another thing from them and I plead with all of you to stop buying anything from TJ Maxx, Marshalls, AJ Wright, Homegoods, or Bob's stores until they start treating their employees as more than something to walk all over.

I am stuck there until I find something better (wow, that makes me feel so depressed), but I'm outta there the second something else (anything else) comes along. Until then I think every time one of the managers speaks to me I will answer with "Yes, Satan?"

My Arch-Nemesis, The Shower

I love showers. There is nothing like a nice shower to help me wake up and start my day. That being said: My shower hates me. I don't know where our relationship went south. I have been nothing but good to it. Despite this fact my shower has been trying to make my life miserable over the last week.

It all started with the water getting colder no matter how much I turned the cold water down. And mind you, this was at the beginning of my showers. No one else had showered to use all of the hot water either. Whenever I turned down the cold water it would get warmer for a few seconds and then go ice cold again. I had to just take as quick of showers as I possibly could to not freeze my butt off.

I guess the evil shower decided that this tactic wasn't working well enough since I hadn't completely left and changed tactics. I had a couple days of blissfully perfect water conditions and then things went bad again. This time it wasn't cold water, but hot.

There I was taking a nice warm shower when all of the sudden the water turned scorching hot. I immediately jumped out of the water and had to call Soren to adjust the water for me since there was no way I was going to go back into the water to reach the knobs. I have no idea why this happened. No one had flushed a toilet or anything. The shower tried to burn me several days in a row and I barely escaped with my skin intact.

Now the shower has gone back to treating me nice. It is probably just trying to figure out its next attack.

Pictures of future yumminess

As requested I'm posting some more pictures of the veggies I'm growing. My little tomato sprouts that I posted a picture of before didn't really make it. There are only 3-4 of all of them that I planted that survived. I was so sad. The guy at the nursery thinks that the fertilizer I mixed into the soil was too much for them. The daycare my best friend takes her baby to has the theme "spoiled with love." The thought that comes to mind in the case of my tomato sprouts is "killed with love." I did everything I could possibly think of to help them grow and thrive, but I guess it was overkill.














The good news in the midst of this tomato tragedy is some of the other things I planted are absolutely thriving. My bell peppers are doing great. They are starting to get more leaves than just the two that all sprouts start out with. You can't really see the leaves that well in this picture, but overall don't they look so green and happy.

As far as the tomatoes are concerned I gave up trying to grow them from seeds this year and went out and bought a few plants. The plants are doing really good so far. They are even starting to flower.

I am also very excited about our fruit trees. Today I noticed that they are getting leaves. It is good to know that we planted them in the ground correctly. Here are pictures are the peach and plum tree. We also planted an apple tree that is budding, but it doesn't have any leaves yet.

We still have a ton more to plant including: baby carrots, green onions, green and yellow string beans, sugar snap peas, zucchini, cantaloupe, and watermelon. Hopefully we will have a ton of delicious produce this summer and fall. I can't wait!

Wow, I feel dumb

All this time I have been wondering why no one ever leaves comments on my blog anymore. I just realized tonight that there is no link to let anyone leave comments. I'm not sure how or when it happened, but in my comments settings it got switched so that new posts didn't have comments. It looks like this has been the case for several months and I just now realized. I have switched it back so that people should be able to comment. It looks like the posts during the months when comments weren't allowed still won't allow comments. However, now the problem will hopefully be fixed.

For anyone that wants to be a part of my last post please leave your comments in this post.