Putting my foot down!

I have always been a person that likes other people to like me. I generally go with the flow and will let other people have their way if I don't feel strongly about something. I also try to do whatever I can to help out. In many ways I think this is a great part of my personality. However, I also realize that some people will take advantage of you when you are a giving person.

I learned this quite well with my last job at TJ Maxx. I was extremely dependable and would almost always step forward if there was an emergency where they needed me to come in. (The one major exception was when they called me on my wedding anniversary and asked me to come in.) In many ways I didn't say no when I should have. Anyway, as I posted here already I have been hired at Amazon. When I informed TJ Maxx that I found another job I told them I would still come in 1 or 2 days a week for the 3 weeks I was doing training at Amazon. I also told the store manager that I wasn't going to be available on Saturdays.

Well, my generosity was horribly abused. The first week after I told the manager this she scheduled me for shifts that conflicted with my training at Amazon and also scheduled me for Saturday. I went in and confronted her about this and she changed the shifts around a little. I ended up working there 4 days that week which I wasn't very happy about considering I had told them 1 or 2 days, but I worked them anyway.

The next week I expected that they would obey what I had told them. I guess that was too much to expect. They scheduled me for another 4 days including Saturday. This time I really wasn't having it. I went in and told the store manager that there was no way I could work that much. (It would have been 50 hours between Amazon and TJ Maxx, plus my college classes.) I literally would have only been home to sleep. She said she would have to take a look at the schedule and she would get back to me and let me know if she could reduce my hours. (How generous of her.) She got back to me and said that she could shorten my hours by 9 hours. I told her it was better, but I still couldn't work on Saturday because I had already made plans. She still didn't remove my from Saturdays schedule. (I guess she didn't realize that I was telling her that I wouldn't work Saturday rather than asking for it off.)

After that I just let her a message that said something to this affect: "I can only work one day next week. If you schedule me for any more than this I will not show up. Also, I cannot work this Saturday. I have already made plans and I can't cancel them. This should give you plenty of time to find someone to work in my place. I told you two weeks ago that I was only able to help 1 - 2 days a week and that I wasn't available Saturdays. I have been very accommodating. Please don't continue to abuse by kindness."

Well, I went in to work on Friday and I wasn't scheduled at all for the next week. It was a big relief not to have to deal with their crap and more. I cleaned out my locker and picked up all my pay stubs. It feels great to say that I am finally free of TJ Maxx.

You may ask yourself what the moral is of this rather long story. Here it is: Realize that you deserve to be treated well, and if you aren't being treated as well as you deserve don't put up with it. I finally put my foot down and it was very empowering. I suggest you all do the same.

Personal realizations

We all have times that we finally come to realize things that have been bouncing around in our head. Tonight I had a girls night with some ladies I know. We went out for dinner and a movie. It was fun chatting and having a break from responsibility. We saw the movie "The Women." It was a cute movie and we were all laughing at several parts. However, at the end I had a somewhat unexpected realization come to me. One of the characters gives birth and at that moment I realized that as much as want children it may never happen and that I need to learn to be okay with that. It was like at that moment I was being told "Julie, I know you won't like this but you need to be strong and learn to be happy without children."

I have actually been thinking a lot lately about the fact that we all need to count the blessings that we already have in our life and not be constantly yearning for something we don't have. Someone I know through the message boards on webmd has been through a lot in the last couple months. She went from trying to have a baby for a long time, to finding out some wonderful news that she was finally pregnant. Then right after this exciting news her husband suddenly died. He was only 30. She tried to take comfort in the fact that at least she would have their child. Now she just found out that she is having a miscarriage. My heart goes out to her. I cannot even fathom the pain and heartache she is feeling right now.

All of this has helped to remind me that I need to be thankful for each and everyday. I have so much to be thankful for. I am lucky to have a wonderful husband who loves me. I also have some wonderful friends that have shown me in many circumstances that they will always be there for me. Most of all: I know that there is a reason for this life. This comforts me during the times when things are hard. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes we just have to have faith that it is there and keep walking forward.

To quote one of my favorite hymns:
"When upon lifes billows you are tempest tossed,

when you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,

Count your many blessings; name them one my one,

And it will suprise you what the Lord has done"

(Count Your Blessings)

Love the new job

So far working for Amazon has been great. I commented to Soren that I wish I had started working there two years ago. I guess TJ Maxx hasn't been all bad, but it sucks compared Amazon. I may be complaining in a few months when things get really busy as we get closer to Christmas. For now I very happy with the change. Plus, I would still be dealing with the holiday rush if I was at TJ Maxx.

Hopefully this job will help us save up some money for when we move back to California. We will definately need some extra money during the time when we are having to look for jobs. Hopefully we won't be out of work for too long. I guess I'll worry about that when it comes though.